- cross-posted to:
- datingredflags@lemmy.tf
- cross-posted to:
- datingredflags@lemmy.tf
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I’ve never had such an annoying color combination for a text message.
Incidentally I just tried banana soylent and it’s pretty good.
I passed this post like 5 times before I read it for this reason
It’s from bumble. That’s their colors
white text on yellow background, that’s infuriating
I had to zoom in on my phone just to be able to read that!
When you’re actually using the app instead of having the compression artifacts of being screenshot several times, it’s not as bad.
I don’t care if you’re watching it in 32k on Odin’s personal account, white on yellow is NEVER acceptable for ANYTHING.
It doesn’t make it less of a crime against good design. Low contrast for reading is bad practice.
It assails the eyes.
It’s kind of nice when people reveal themselves to be insufferable douchebags at the outset rather than wasting your time.
her persistence indicates he is physically attractive
As my wife will tell you, there are benefits to being married to an insufferable douchebag. Chiefly, you can be pretty confident they won’t play around on you, because no one else will have them.
He has a valid point there. If he doesn’t want to say , you keep talking the same shit and expect a different answer?
Not wanting to answer a question is fine, but doing that by just being pretentious isn’t a good way of going about it. Being forthcoming about not really wanting to talk about your music preferences is fine, changing the subject politely is also fine so you don’t leave the onus of carrying conversation entirely on the other person.
Acting like your music choices are too out there for anyone else to understand is a good way to not have them relate to you in any way.
Right. He could have countered with different topic.
If someone does not take the least amount of effort to answer a simple question like that one … then he doesn’t care about you in the slightest.
“But its a generic question!”
Two words: common courtesy.
People (guys usually) also answer like this when they are trying to tell you exactly what you want to hear so that you’ll sleep with them. They feel like if they give any wrong answer early on, they’ve lost their chance. It’s a very manipulative mindset. He was like a deer in the headlights, not knowing if any answer he gave would be the right answer since he doesn’t know her at all yet. So he stalls, hoping she’ll drop it.
Or he might just be an idiot.
Either way, drop them and move on to somebody who will be real with you.
In other words, playing games, i.e trying to “tick her funne bone” so he gets someone else to play instead of himself. But what most of those guys fail to acknowledge is that “tickling her funne bone” takes time – it’s not a “free pussy pass” of any sort that you “say it”, and she goes “WHOOAAA fuck me mister! Fuck me right NOW!”. That is not “acting tough” or smart, but acting like a douche.
Yeah, that was my thought as well. This is the type of person who is only going to say something of they think it will impress you. The second possibility is that they will share nothing of themselves, period. In either case, they don’t seem like good relationship material.
What he gave was the wrong answer IMO.
They feel like if they give any wrong answer early on, they’ve lost their chance.
To be fair, that’s usually correct. Women have their pick of men, generally. If a guy answers a band she doesn’t like, most likely she’ll move on.
So guys lie and tell her everything she wants to hear. And then once they get their foot in the door, they can start telling the truth.
This guy handled it very badly but I can see why he didn’t want to answer.
Yeah I may not be a relationship expert but if I have to lie for an ice breaker not even a deep question just an ice breaker I don’t think that relation will work
Nah it’s one of those things where some guys just prefer to talk about what they think matters to everyone, their job or financial conditions, music or other personal stuff might just be an extra on their minds
So an idiot.
If someone asks you about your taste in music, then clearly music matters to them.
It’s was Nickelback
Never made it as a wise man…
bro wasn’t listening to anything and didn’t know what to say
That and he’s a mega insecure duchebag. “I don’t know, I haven’t been listening much music lately” would have worked just fine, or at the very least it couldn’t possibly be this bad.
What did Nickelback ever do to you?
Nothing wrong with NB, was just being funny bc the internet hates them and is funny.
I was quoting a comic. I cannot remember his name.
I’m pretty amazed that people don’t immediately hear the stereotypical doucheyness, as well as the teenager-pandering, intelligence-insulting, terrible messages the moment they hear Nickelback.
Maybe I don’t hate Nickelback for the same “gut” reasons the internet does, but I sure do hate them.
This is a red flag. It means he listens exclusively to Nickelback and Creed.
Ugh, also u2
Biggest fucking red flag of all
That’s a flag I’d fly any day
Lmao, this is indeed a red flag, stay the fuck back haha
I think with the horror show dating has become in general, people are becoming more and more afraid to be vulnerable in even the slightest perceived ways. 😞 There’s a reason for the loneliness epidemic. Between mass narcissism and guttural fear of winding up with a person who will just use/abuse you, I’m shocked I haven’t seen worse. 😐
Oddly enough, since I’m so used to being open when I’m ~anonynous on the internet, when I need a confidence push to be open with someone in person I just pretend I’m on the internet and they’re a stranger, and bum bam wam suddenly I don’t give a shit what they think of me & I can just speak comfortably
I can imagine it going that way, too. It really depends on the person. It’s odd…we seem to have built this culture around distrust and winning at any cost and it feels good at first glance. Once you dig deeper, though, the whole thing is just ugly. If I lost my husband, I’d voluntarily choose to be alone. I’m not willing to have my heart torn out and having it used to beat me within an inch of my life. >_<
Yea the lack of confidence is not without reason for sure. It’s like the “fake-it-till-you-make-it” idea which in practice only works when the feeling of insecurity is overstepping. The confidence boost just snaps me out of that headspace which is nice, and every now n then I still say something goofy but iddiswuddidis
As a dude…
Dude…
The last four songs I’ve listened to on YouTube are three pirate shanties and “We Know The Way” from the Moana soundtrack. I’m not answering this question either. :)
Smart move. Wouldn’t want to intimidate anyone with your superior taste in music
Honestly though that’s the exact kind of thing I would want to know- the real you, not the you that tell me you are.
Fuck that, “We know the way” slaps
If that person can’t share music, god knows what else they can’t share
If I have to pry answers out of someone, I’d rather cut my losses and move on.
Does this guy think he’s cool or mysterious?
He probably thinks she’s playing hard to get or some BS.
I think he is the one trying to play hard and it isn’t working
You might be right I got mixed up with the message/response.
Big ooof, either hard to get, or he’s just such a pessimist that he thinks his interests just aren’t worth sharing. Either way, he ain’t gonna get anywhere.
Kudos to you for demonstrating interest in getting to know whoever you cross on these platforms (a rarity these days…) 🙌🏽
I relate to your discomfort. I usually unmatch or block such vibes bc the point of these apps is to date, which implies getting to know each other. If one is unwilling to put in the work (as minimal as it may seem), just spare folx who are interested in the above.
So much has changed in the dating scene. Sometimes, I am asked why I am being nosy or psychoanalyzing them. 🙄 Dude, you’re on a dating app, right?
P.S.: I respect boundaries, but such questions are essential in familiarizing oneself with someone.
You use the term “you” a lot here. This is an old post, so you’re not going to be talking to the actual person that experienced this
Haha I’m so edgy haha why do you want to know? Haha you probably wouldn’t even like it haha.
I’m not like other 25 year olds hahaha
A cloud of adjectives surrounding no noun.
Id say she got to know just about eveything she needed to know about this person.
“It’s something you’ve never heard of”
“How do you know?”
“…because I’m never going to tell you about it”
Maybe it’s just a super closely guarded musical secret he has to keep. The cabal of music keepers does not take blabbermouths lightly
Hammerfall. That is all.
Technically the truth
Someone’s insecure about his Shakira collection.
Seriously though, I’m guessing this guy either doesn’t like music at all (I’ve known a few and they act like this) or got made fun of a lot for his music tastes in high school. It’s a shame this guy is probably a walking insecurity.
Which is a great reason to unmatch him and move on.
I didn’t even know it was humanly possible to not like music at all. What were they like? Like their personalities? Did they seem sociopathic or were they generally “normal”?
Nobody’s normal, we are all weird in our own way.
I used to jokingly say “I don’t really listen to music” when people would open with that at college parties. The reactions were worthwhile.
I played guitar in a band.
“I don’t listen to music”
“…but you play guitar?”
“Yes. With very good earplugs.”
”I just play it, I don’t listen to it.”
I used to not like music at all and 15 year old me would have probably responded just like this guy. But for me it was more that I didn’t know what I liked until I heard it. Everyone around me exclusively listened to top 40 and RnB, or techno/house. I seriously thought there was something wrong with me cos I hated everything I heard. And then I heard metal for the first time, and everything changed.
There’s a lot of good examples in the comments, but the few Ive ran into were more indifferent thsn anything - like, they never heard anything that appealed to them. One guy I knew actively avoided music because it’d get stuck in his head and drive him nuts.
They seemed normal otherwise, for the most part. But they knew that disliking music was weird and were a little insecute about it.
Yeah this is like the people who would answer “radio” back in the day, when asked what their favourite music was ._.
I used to share my music taste quite openly but these days not so much. Sharing stuff just gives some people more ammo to shoot you with when they want to try hold shit over your head
You don’t have a music taste problem, you have a social circle problem. Those people aren’t your friends. Who, other than a kid in school, would willingly spend time with someone who “holds shit over your head”?
early shakira songs in spanish are the bomb though, look up her mtv unplugged album
ayooo whenever, wherever is 🔥🔥🔥 fr fr on god no cap fam
Oh absolutely, no shade on Shakira at all. Just using her as an example of something a guy might be insecure about - which is of course, stupid. Don’t be insecure about liking music, folks.
