Why are you worried about that parachute? It has a lifetime guarantee.
“Good to the last drop!”
Anti-dragon cream. Personal guarantee: if you’re incinerated you get your money back, no quibble.’ 'What you’re saying,’ said Vimes slowly, 'if I understand the wording correctly, is that if I am baked alive by the dragon you’ll return the money?’ 'Upon personal application,’ said Cut-Me-Own-Throat.
Love some Terry Pratchett
Unless life ends?
Thatsthejoke.zip
Literally a lifetime guarantee then
Parachutes also haven’t been scientifically proven to work. They’ve never been double blind tested.
Ghost-Repellant. Prevents the viewing and interaction with ghosts.
All reviews 5-star. Sell this product for easy money XD.
This product not intended to prevent, diagnose, treat, or cure any disease
The Doctor stole my grandma’s wig.