• Blackmist@feddit.ukEnglish
    112·
    23 hours ago

    I’m sure the Tolkien nerds can convince Amazon to make an entire series about Tom.

    I mean it can’t be much worse than Rings of fucking Power…

  • This is fine🔥🐶☕🔥@lemmy.worldEnglish
    49·
    1 day ago

    Why didn’t just Tom wear the Ring as he makes passionate love with his wife, so he can force Sauron to watch.

    Sauron, who is a virgin, who never had a gf and was dismembered and reduced to a giant eye by a fucking human would realize he is nothing compared to Tom, whose girth is beyond even Eru Ilúvatar’s comprehension.

    Wishing to die but unable to kill himself as he doesn’t even have a fucking hand to pull the trigger, he would order his orc armies to piss on him, so that the flames of his eye can be extinguished and his mind can be set free of Tom’s all encompassing girth. His spirit would be released to the boundless void that ripples and contorts with Tom’s mighty thrusts and he would find no solace.

    Edit: When Tom thrusts his final thrust and shoots a billion Bombadillos deep into Goldberry’s loins, the impact would shatter Sauron’s soul into a billion Saurodillos and he would be free. When this happens, not even the wisest can tell.

  • FiskFisk33@startrek.websiteEnglish
    64·
    1 day ago

    Well…

    Since they didn’t get trapped in the barrow downs (and subsequently saved by Tom) they didn’t find the barrow swords, specifically enchanted to be effective against the which witch King.

    When merry stabs the which witch king therefore nothing should happen.

    literally unwatchable.

  • Zorsith@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
    441·
    2 days ago

    He really isnt, outside the plot point of where the dagger that killed the witch king came from.

    The Scouring of the Shire, on the other hand…

  • WraithGear@lemmy.worldEnglish
    6·
    1 day ago

    Wasn’t his purpose to give the readers a break and to give Gandalf enough time to do a misadventure?

    • Seleni@lemmy.worldEnglish
      161·
      1 day ago

      No, his purpose was to show there was a wider world and a deeper history to Middle-Earth than we got to see in the books. Tolkien was dropping hints like that all over the story; Tom was just the biggest one.

      It also was the way Merry got his special wraith-killing sword, and it gave a bit of a glimpse into the limitations of the powers of the ring, foreshadowing Sam’s ability to give it up freely.

  • Rakonat@lemmy.worldEnglish
    285·
    2 days ago

    I read the books twice. I will never get those hours slogging through Toms chapters back and he was entirely irrelevant to the plot.

    It was like a fever dream that could have been written off as a mass hallucination of the hobbits after Merry and Pippin share some weed they stole from Gandalf.

    • ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
      2·
      15 hours ago

      I will never get those hours slogging through Toms chapters back

      And they’re so near the start of the book too, before anything really interesting happens. I nearly stopped reading there. (I didn’t stop only because I had enjoyed The Hobbit so much.)

    • LaLuzDelSol@lemmy.worldEnglish
      61·
      1 day ago

      Me reading all of Bran’s chapters in ASOIAF. On rereads I literally just skip his chapters it’s so liberating. I just pretend he died when Jamie pushed him out of the tower and the story plays put exactly the same. (Also I haven’t watched the show yet no spoilers pls)

      • grissino@lemmy.worldEnglish
        6·
        21 hours ago

        When you watch the show, stop after season 5 and pretend it was cancelled. You will be much happier in life this way. And skip the commentary halfway through season 5 as well…

        • bob_lemon@feddit.orgEnglish
          1·
          6 hours ago

          Canceled after 5? So just like the books.

          At this point, I have zero confidence that Winds of Winter will be any good. Even if he ever actually finishes writing it, GRRM is too busy pulling new plot points out of his ass rather than finish the threads he already started.

        • jacksilver@lemmy.worldEnglish
          3·
          15 hours ago

          After partway through season 6 I told my friends the show had lost it and that it was going downhill (I think it really started with Jamie warping around like travel/time didn’t matter anymore). Either way, while people didn’t agree at the time, by season 8 it was more than evident.

  • zephorah@lemm.eeEnglish
    225·
    2 days ago

    I skip all his songs. Page ahead. And I will continue to do so.

    • RuBisCO@slrpnk.netEnglish
      261·
      2 days ago

      Hey! Come merry dol! derry dol! My darling!
      Light goes the weather-wind and the feathered starling.
      Down along under Hill, shining in the sunlight,
      Waiting on the doorstep for the cold starlight,
      There my pretty lady is, River-woman’s daughter,
      Slender as the willow-wand, clearer than the water.
      Old Tom Bombadil water-lilies bringing
      Comes hopping home again. Can you hear him singing?
      Hey! Come merry dol! Derry dol! and merry-o,
      Goldberry, Goldberry, merry yellow berry-o!
      Poor old Willow-man, you tuck your roots away!
      Tom’s in a hurry now. Evening will follow day.
      Tom’s going home again water-lilies bringing.
      Hey! Come derry dol! Can you hear me singing?

  • ExcessShiv@lemmy.dbzer0.comEnglish
    166·
    2 days ago

    I fucking hated the Tom Bombadil character, he’s an insufferable annoying twat with all his bullshit singing, I’m so happy he wasn’t in the movies.