Here in WA state, the minimum wage per hour is $15.74 (higher in some areas). Tipping culture says 20%, but that’s generally to support lower paid waitstaff in areas that can pay less than minimum wage by employers. Where/What are you tipping and what kind of service would you expect for a 20% tip?
I don’t tip because I live in a country that doesn’t tip and I’m very against it ever taking root here.
Those things about controlling the service, and choosing who “deserves” what, are anathema to me.
The person is doing a job however they and their employer see fit. If they want to run a business like Basil Fawlty that’s on them.
My input into what they get paid is to vote for strong labour laws, min wage rises, and workers’ rights. If a tipping culture emerged it would most likely weaken those things and make wages more capricious and less fair. We must resist it.