drop your childhood stories:
>be me, age 12
>hate showering more than anything
>it feels gross and i hate getting wet
>my mom starts telling me that if i don’t shower every day then i can’t eat dinner
>i want my dindin so i come up with a genius plan
>let the shower run for 10-15 minutes while i sit in the bathroom
>quickly wet my hair with sink
>mom buys it, i get dindin
>after a month she gets suspicious
>realize i have to step up my game
>now i run the shower and rub my arms/neck with hand soap
>also run my hair under the shower so it’s dripping wet and not just moist
>she asks why i haven’t asked her to buy shampoo yet
>come up with final version of my genius plan
>i’ll stand next to the shower, let the water run, rub soap on my whole body and also use shampoo on my hair so it smells like shampoo
>then i’ll rinse off in the sink
>all while the shower runs

i did this for four years until i realized i was just showering on hard mode

  • sbv@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
    1791·
    10 months ago

    Kids are great. Mine spend 5-10 minutes refusing to do a two minute task.

    Kind of like how I spend three or four days avoiding a ten minute phone call.

      • GregorGizeh@lemmy.zip
        618·
        10 months ago

        Not the flex you think it is lol

        Seriously, get your teeth fixed. It’s such a huge impact on your quality of life, especially later in life when that damage really starts to affect your eating habits or self confidence

        • Duranie@literature.cafe
          621·
          10 months ago

          I wouldn’t call it a flex. But sometimes openly admitting something even to strangers on the Internet can offer some ownership of the situation and start someone headed the right direction.

        • KingJalopy @lemm.ee
          21·
          10 months ago

          Not to mention, you could literally fucking die from a tooth infection if left untreated.

      • Zoot@reddthat.com
        2·
        10 months ago

        Fuck me i think I’m on my way to living the pain you had to endure… Maybe I can get another few years like you… maybe

      • 7u5k3n@lemmy.world
        1·
        10 months ago

        Broke a tooth on a pizza crust once… 5 years later it abscessed and I had to have emergency surgery to have it removed.

        Fun times :/

          • Kusimulkku@lemm.ee
            1·
            10 months ago

            I’m just waiting Americans to come in and tell that actually that’s just Houston style pizza or some shit and it’s supposed to be like that (also it’s a cube, don’t worry about it)

            • Holyhandgrenade@lemmy.world
              1·
              10 months ago

              Houston lobbied for the FDA to permit the addition of glass shards to pizza dough as a bulking agent. What doesn’t kill your teeth and internal organs can only make you stronger!

    • qevlarr@lemmy.world
      35·
      10 months ago

      “dinner is ready in two minutes”

      Two minutes later, dinner ready

      “but I just started a new game!”

      🙄

    • CJOtheReal@ani.social
      9·
      10 months ago

      4 days… I’ve been avoiding some phone calls for straight up 3 years now, the people probably think im dead.