More young adults are choosing to live with their parents than any time since the Great Depression, according to research co-authored by Wharton’s Susan Wachter.
What does having left and found how harsh and difficult it is affect their need to pay rent? What if they lost their job and they couldn’t afford where they were living? Would you refuse them unless they paid rent?
What are you doing with that rent? Is it going to utilities? Food?
Or a savings account for them to get a down payment somewhere?
Everyone has different opinions on this, and I will share mine.
After a certain age, you are a adult. Some financial stake involved to ensure both parties are treated fairly. If you never housed someone before, there will ALWAYS be something. Drama, conflict, explaining house rules and preferences.
In 2010 I allowed a college friend to live with me for a month no strings attached, by week 6, I asked them to start chipping in. I think that’s fair. They were into penny trading, refused to do any chores, and nearly killed my pets from their actions. Once I made it a financial transaction, they cleaned up and when they failed to meet the rent, they left on their own accord.
My incel cousin who has been practicing to be a Mini-Joe Rogan with his TikTok BS, asked me if I can let him use the guest room, and the moment I let him know about rent requirements, suddenly he backed off.
While I absolutely believe that some adults do have a breakdown need time to heal their wounds, some contribution is required. In the words of Benjamin Franklin, “Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days.”
Or a savings account for them to get a down payment somewhere?
A few years back, my other cousin couldn’t live with her mom anymore at age 18, and crashed with us until she moved out to her college dorm. Stayed with us for four months. And the $200/month rent was given back to her as a housewarming gift (I actually doubled it).
Where my sister who got pregnant moved in with my parents, originally her money went to help pay for bills. She never left, but now as my parents are aged, she manages the finances.
Contribution is usually going to be taking care of the basic household chores. Let your host come home and not have to worry about things. They won’t resent you for it.
I didn’t mean anything negative, though I feel I had worded my response to you somewhat hostile.
To the reply above yours here, I find guests different than children returning home. I certainly think there are circumstances around each so it’s hard to make blanket statements. If someone is taking advantage, then I can see the rent issue come into play. But I’ve also seen it the other way where someone down on their luck trying to make ends meet was made to pay rent while their parents pocketed the money for their own entertainment.
The thing is, you just assumed that. You know nothing about me or my morals. You assume I would just pocket the money and just laugh at some disadvantaged person. This is the problem with reddit and lemmy. Pompous dip shits like yourself always looking down on anybody who has a different opinion or outlook on situations. And then inserting your own garbage narrative
I didn’t assume anything, I was mostly asking for clarity, though in a less than kind way that made it seem like I was judging you.
I didn’t mean to be a pompous ass. I just genuinely do not understand having children pay rent if they move back home. I’m not trying to understand any other relation that wants to crash with you. Just your children, what about moving back home makes you want to charge them rent? From my experience, I haven’t met anyone that moved out who actually wanted to move back home with their parents unless they had no other choice.
I have a rule for my kids. You can stay for free as long as you want. If you move out, you can come back, but then you pay rent.
Why?
What does having left and found how harsh and difficult it is affect their need to pay rent? What if they lost their job and they couldn’t afford where they were living? Would you refuse them unless they paid rent?
What are you doing with that rent? Is it going to utilities? Food?
Or a savings account for them to get a down payment somewhere?
Everyone has different opinions on this, and I will share mine.
After a certain age, you are a adult. Some financial stake involved to ensure both parties are treated fairly. If you never housed someone before, there will ALWAYS be something. Drama, conflict, explaining house rules and preferences.
In 2010 I allowed a college friend to live with me for a month no strings attached, by week 6, I asked them to start chipping in. I think that’s fair. They were into penny trading, refused to do any chores, and nearly killed my pets from their actions. Once I made it a financial transaction, they cleaned up and when they failed to meet the rent, they left on their own accord.
My incel cousin who has been practicing to be a Mini-Joe Rogan with his TikTok BS, asked me if I can let him use the guest room, and the moment I let him know about rent requirements, suddenly he backed off.
While I absolutely believe that some adults do have a breakdown need time to heal their wounds, some contribution is required. In the words of Benjamin Franklin, “Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days.”
A few years back, my other cousin couldn’t live with her mom anymore at age 18, and crashed with us until she moved out to her college dorm. Stayed with us for four months. And the $200/month rent was given back to her as a housewarming gift (I actually doubled it).
Where my sister who got pregnant moved in with my parents, originally her money went to help pay for bills. She never left, but now as my parents are aged, she manages the finances.
Really depends on the circumstances.
Contribution is usually going to be taking care of the basic household chores. Let your host come home and not have to worry about things. They won’t resent you for it.
I’d respond myself but I believe you summed it up pretty well. People always assume the worst when I say what I say.
I didn’t mean anything negative, though I feel I had worded my response to you somewhat hostile.
To the reply above yours here, I find guests different than children returning home. I certainly think there are circumstances around each so it’s hard to make blanket statements. If someone is taking advantage, then I can see the rent issue come into play. But I’ve also seen it the other way where someone down on their luck trying to make ends meet was made to pay rent while their parents pocketed the money for their own entertainment.
The thing is, you just assumed that. You know nothing about me or my morals. You assume I would just pocket the money and just laugh at some disadvantaged person. This is the problem with reddit and lemmy. Pompous dip shits like yourself always looking down on anybody who has a different opinion or outlook on situations. And then inserting your own garbage narrative
Did you start drinking between comments?
I didn’t assume anything, I was mostly asking for clarity, though in a less than kind way that made it seem like I was judging you.
I didn’t mean to be a pompous ass. I just genuinely do not understand having children pay rent if they move back home. I’m not trying to understand any other relation that wants to crash with you. Just your children, what about moving back home makes you want to charge them rent? From my experience, I haven’t met anyone that moved out who actually wanted to move back home with their parents unless they had no other choice.
So they know not to count on you if they need help, got it. This is why people become homeless.