Legendary director Werner Herzog is making rounds in the cinesphere after the late directors latest film is screened at Cannes. Many audience members were shocked with many of them fleeing the theatre in terror, Werner who was also in the audience shouted “Stop! Turn the lights on turn on the lights!… it’s just a movie look I still have my penis” and proceeded to pull his pants down to reveal a bloody festering stump. According to one witness, as Herzog was standing taught and exposing himself and was grinning the whole time, “he looked like the devil incarnate, proudly exposing his self mutilation as if it was all part of some abstract work of art. It was nothing short of a desperate attempt to garner attention. My respect for him as an artist has plummeted.” But other members are not as quick to judge the late director with one person calling it “his magnum opus” and “a spectacular display of true artistry that can only be experienced once, it’s a once in a life time opportunity and I am glad to have shared it with Herzog himself.”

Herzog was later detained by French police for exposing himself and proceeded to reenact a scene from his film Aguirre, The Wrath of God / Aguirre, Der Zorn Gottes as he was being arrested. As Herzog was reciting a speech by the mad conquistador, he was expelling waste from his anus. Witnesses recall some police recoiling and vomiting as Herzog laughed and kept passing diarrhea all over them. Some theories suggest Herzog is suffering from dementia and this wretched display is a part of his mental degradation.