ZeroCool@slrpnk.net to The Onion@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 month agoElon Musk calls for constitution to be replaced with Ferengi Rules of Acquisitionnewsthump.comexternal-linkmessage-square9fedilinkarrow-up1347arrow-down19 cross-posted to: tenforward@lemmy.world
arrow-up1338arrow-down1external-linkElon Musk calls for constitution to be replaced with Ferengi Rules of Acquisitionnewsthump.comZeroCool@slrpnk.net to The Onion@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 month agomessage-square9fedilink cross-posted to: tenforward@lemmy.world
minus-squarecyrano@lemmy.dbzer0.comlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up53·1 month agoHere are some of the most well-known Ferengi Rules of Acquisition: Rule 1: Once you have their money, never give it back. Rule 3: Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to. Rule 6: Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity. Rule 7: Keep your ears open. Rule 9: Opportunity plus instinct equals profit. Rule 16: A deal is a deal… until a better one comes along. Rule 17: A contract is a contract is a contract… but only between Ferengi. Rule 21: Never place friendship above profit. Rule 45: Expand or die. Rule 59: A smart Ferengi can hear profit in the wind. Rule 62: The riskier the road, the greater the profit. Rule 74: Knowledge equals profit. Rule 85: A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all. Rule 94: Females and finances don’t mix. Rule 98: Every man has his price. Rule 102: A Ferengi with no latinum is no Ferengi at all. Rule 162: Even in the worst of times, someone turns a profit. Rule 208: Sometimes the only thing more dangerous than a question is an answer.
minus-squareBossDj@lemm.eelinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up31·1 month agoSo this is another example of The Onion being way too close to the truth
minus-squareSatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up6arrow-down1·1 month agoIt’s newsthump.
minus-squareRubberDuck@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up10·1 month agoTreat your employees like family, exploit them.
Here are some of the most well-known Ferengi Rules of Acquisition:
Rule 1: Once you have their money, never give it back.
Rule 3: Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to.
Rule 6: Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity.
Rule 7: Keep your ears open.
Rule 9: Opportunity plus instinct equals profit.
Rule 16: A deal is a deal… until a better one comes along.
Rule 17: A contract is a contract is a contract… but only between Ferengi.
Rule 21: Never place friendship above profit.
Rule 45: Expand or die.
Rule 59: A smart Ferengi can hear profit in the wind.
Rule 62: The riskier the road, the greater the profit.
Rule 74: Knowledge equals profit.
Rule 85: A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all.
Rule 94: Females and finances don’t mix.
Rule 98: Every man has his price.
Rule 102: A Ferengi with no latinum is no Ferengi at all.
Rule 162: Even in the worst of times, someone turns a profit.
Rule 208: Sometimes the only thing more dangerous than a question is an answer.
So this is another example of The Onion being way too close to the truth
It’s newsthump.
Treat your employees like family, exploit them.