• Snapz@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    Corporations and politicians: “oh great news everyone… It worked. Time to kick off phase 2…”

    • Replace all the water trump wasted in California with brawndo
    • Sell mortgages for eggs, but call them patriot pods
    • Welcome to Costco, I love you
    • All medicine replaced with raw milk enemas
    • Handjobs at Starbucks
    • Ow my balls, Tuesdays this fall on CBS
    • Chocolate rations have gone up from 10 to 6
    • All government vehicles are cybertrucks
    • trump nft cartoons on all USD, incest legal, Ivanka new first lady.
    • Public executions on pay per view, lowered into deep fried turkey fryer on white house lawn, your meat is then mixed in with the other mechanically separated protein on the Tyson foods processing line (run exclusively by 3rd graders) and packaged without distinction on label.
    • FDA doesn’t inspect food or drugs. Everything approved and officially change acronym to F(uck You) D(umb) A(ss)