A bit of a rant, pre-sorry but so sad and annoyed right now.
Went to my favorite barber shop today. It’s built on being nice, upscale, and men’s haircuts. They do the works, good cuts, beard trimming/shaping, hot towel, the whole thing, and it’s built to be man’s place, they have a pool table, they have a couple of kegerators, they’ll pour you a whiskey while you wait. Very nice.
(Note I say man’s but really if you’re a woman/any other gender and you like that sort of thing, then awesome. I mean man in the masculine sense)
Until recently this was my favorite place, but apparently it’s gotten on the mom groups online and now the last few times I’ve gone it’s just filled with children and moms. Where I could go and get a whiskey while I wait and find someone to shoot pool with, now kids are literally running around and as for the pool table they’re just throwing the balls around. Meanwhile the moms are either talking with each other or hovering over Bradley getting his hair cut and how cute it is.
On top of it all, because there was a group of them instead of my normal 20 min wait it was almost a 2 hours wait. I just walked out.
I’m just so tired of it, this place obviously was built for adults but god forbid we have any adult places that aren’t “actually meant for children”. I mean obviously it was built for children, there’s 2 kegs and a shelf of nice scotch but yes, bring all of your children here.
How come every place that used to be for adults is now a child zone? My favorite breweries used to be great places to let off steam after work and now I have kids playing tag in the middle of them. I flat out don’t go to movies anymore because even the super late showings are just dumping grounds for inattentive parents to leave their kids. And god forbid you ever mention outside a community like this that you want to drink a beer without a kid running around or you’re literally the devil who should be shunned.
Anyway, this isn’t going anywhere specifically, I’m just really sad, and I didn’t get my haircut today.
Late stage capitalism, savage capitalism, an overcapitalized society, whatever you want to call it… It’s a bunch of different factors that all eat away at the social fabric that make raising kids easier
Housing is expensive, and people frequently move for a job. It’s pretty unusual to live next door to family, who would often give free childcare. You also don’t get neighborhoods full of young parents anymore - everyone is just living wherever they can afford to
For-profit media - thanks to decades of horror stories (of crimes that peaked in the 80s, but are great for viewership), leaving a child not in the hands of a specific, designated adult is grounds for a CPS visit in a lot of places. You can’t drop them off at the park (even if there are many adults present) or leave them at home anymore, regardless of if they actually need the supervision. It’s one thing if they’re 3, but a 7 year old can generally keep themselves alive pretty well, especially if you prepare them for it
Monetization and over scheduling - activities for them are paid and have specific time slots. Tae Kwon do is an hour at 6, soccer is 5-7… If you’re late you need to find someone to watch them. And most of that requires money and a big time investment because of car culture
Babysitters are the exception, but they’re either rare or expensive. Minimum wage isn’t near enough for teens to want to do such a crap job (parents often treat them like crap and expect a lot more from them now), and teens are less trusted. They even have certifications for teens that are a few hundred bucks to teach them what to do in an emergency - basically the heimlich maneuver, how to change a diaper, and when to call 911. Adult professionals have regulations to meet, and are a significant cost
Finally, we’re pushed hard to be individuals that can be interchangeable and portable labor. Outside of family, we don’t have the same tight bonds of friendship our parents or grandparents did… And even family doesn’t mean what it used to
Yeah, I don’t buy that humanity has drastically changed all of a sudden. It’s the circumstances that are different and we’re all paying the price.
I mean, yeah? I just listed a bunch of circumstances
Humans are the most trainable animals we know of. The differences are due to the systems we’ve built - humans aren’t much different, but the way we organize has changed rapidly
People normally adapt to their environment. Having goals of a close social network and a tight family isn’t important to the environment of the USA (probably most of the world). This environment is to use you up and make as much money off your labor as possible with giving you as little as possible.
That doesn’t leave much left over for you to focus your energy and time to your family, friends, and social gatherings.