Here’s what I would recommend, I think it would be good to remove the rule exemption permitting loli considering it is actually illegal in the us due ti the PROTECT Act. Then afterwards because I know lemmy Instances won’t be so open to forgiveness I recommend changing the subdomain from lemmy to something else like lemmings or forum (can be whatever you want it just can’t be lemmy because that’s been defederated) and making the lemmy one redirect to that, then the instance will be able to Federate again and since the rule exemption that concerned everyone won’t be there you likely won’t get defederated again as long people here behave well.

I can’t vote for any option here since I’m not a member, only make recommendations, I would recommend not allowing something that has a high probability of violating US law which could harm you legally. There have been people arrested for possession of loli before, it does happen.