No it’s not. It’s the butthole. There’s nothing but shit in it!

Washington DC is the wang. Thats where America fucks everyone from.

…what?

Uuugggghhhhhhh…STOP BEING RIGHT!!! Look, I want to argue what you’re saying, but factually it is correct.

I just don’t WANT it to be right.

checks notes

It’s week 3. Out of 208.

…super mario? Is that you? Or santa claus. I can’t tell.

See, this is satire…because it’s NOT a threat. He does stupid shit all the time!

I mean really, how the fuck do you bankrupt ONE casino, let alone THREE??? THE HOUSE ALWAYS WINS!!! HOW DO YOU FUCK THAT UP SO BADLY???

sigh

This is the cutting wit I should be laughing at…but life is too depressing.

Here’s the problem with Bernie Sanders.

Everything he says is rational, and makes sense, and is based in fact and logic. The problem is, we’ve moved past that. If the DNC would have run sanders in 2016, I have a feeling we’d all be laughing at that time trump won the GOP nomination.

But…history is what it is, and trump has moved us into crazy territory.

Nothing you say now without some absurd viewpoint, with a foundation lacking logic will just fall on deaf ears.

We don’t want to hear about stableizing healthcare. We want to hear about space ships doing nascar races through the galaxy to fund the ecconomy. We want to hear about taking over other countries and renaming them faux patriotic names. We want to hear about how china is our biggest enemy in the universe…so we’re going to do absolutely nothing about it besides engage in trade agreements that benefit both sides.

We’re ready to see if Boston Robotics has human robots that have free will and can be programmed to be ticklish. And then spend all day tickling them tied up against their will.

This is the 2025 we’re living in. We VOTED FOR this. Not some technicality. Full on popular vote voted for the world we got and will get for the next 4 years, after already having a 4 year taste before. We elected an old guy with a dementia just to get away from this guy…and ran right back to him.

I fully expect him to run for 3rd term. Yes, I know about the 2 term limit. Have you not been paying attention? We don’t live in a world of facts and rules. We live in absurdity where everything goes! Go pee on your neighbor! Nobody gives a shit! Blame drew carry! Everythings made up and the points don’t matter.

Many of my exs were fat when I met them.

Trump? Doing illegal things??? Shocked! I am shocked! Yes, that’s the word. No other word describes my feelings on this! Shocked I say!!!

…not that shocked actually.

This should be an ad for untitled goose game.

Step 1: get young actress with big boobs who wants her next big break to wear a bikini with their logo to jump on a trampoline to shoot a commercial to be shown at the superbowl.

There is no step 2. This is how easy marketing is. Take a logo, slap it on some young tits, have them bounce. People remember your brand now!

I mean…that’s kind of the point.

Oh no, it’s worse than that. I’ve explained several times to several people the terrible business practices that nestle use.

I’ve named off some of the bigger products they make.

90% of people I’ve explained this to gave zero shits. The other 10% feigned interest but didn’t change their behavior.

So, the people I’ve explained it to can’t feign ignorance. It’s apathy.

Don’t give the swastica website clickable advertising! You can just say kanye west is doing it. We don’t need the web address.

I’m starting to lose my mind I feel it

Ha ha ha…

…yeah…

Oooooooh. You mean killed his usage as a mascot. I thought he meant the actual owl died.

No it doesn’t. It could be Ted Danson. And I assume Ted Danson doesn’t even know about the fediverse.

The same…boat??? BOAT???

BOATS BOATS BOATS

Aw, I like the Canadian flag. I’m not Canadian, but I like Canada. Bunch of good people up there.

What I’m trying to say is…PLEASE LET ME IN!!! GET ME OUTTA THIS HELL HOLE AMERICA!!! I’m even in Cleveland! It wouldn’t even be that far away! Just I’ll borrow a jetski in the summer, and I’ll be over in like…20 minutes. I don’t know how long it takes to cross Lake Erie. I assume it’s short.