There are people I love. There are people who love me. I fight for what I believe, protect those I could, and stand my ground against the encroaching darkness.

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Joined 8 months ago
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Cake day: February 23rd, 2024

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  • Milton: We use only the finest baby frogs, dew picked and flown from Iraq, cleansed in finest quality spring water, lightly killed, and then sealed in a succulent Swiss quintuple smooth treble cream milk chocolate envelope and lovingly frosted with glucose.

    Praline: That’s as maybe, it’s still a frog.

    Milton: What else?

    Praline: Well don’t you even take the bones out?

    Milton: If we took the bones out it wouldn’t be crunchy would it?

    Praline: Superintendent Parrot ate one of those.

    Parrot: Excuse me a moment. (exits hurriedly)

    Milton: It says ‘crunchy frog’ quite clearly.

    Praline: Well, the superintendent thought it was an almond whirl. People won’t expect there to be a frog in there. They’re bound to think it’s some form of mock frog.

    Milton: (insulted) Mock frog? We use no artificial preservatives or additives of any kind!

    Praline: Nevertheless, I must warn you that in future you should delete the words ‘crunchy frog’, and replace them with the legend ‘crunchy raw unboned real dead frog’, if you want to avoid prosecution.