Your DE won’t use that much cpu no matter which you use.

As long as you want to run out of ram you should be fine.

But imo it’s a bad idea to mix a server os with a normal desktop use.

How about using proxmox and having a vm just for desktop use, like this you could also just pause all the resources easily when you’re not using your desktop computer. Personally i would have a debian stable and a proxomx vm and just enable the proxmox vm whenever I need it.

If your not scared of scripting you could also unsuspend the vm via a keyboard listener. (for example trigger unsuspend when key f3 is pressed. This would be doable with evtest and qm resume )

Or if you don’t want to use a vm you could also disable the autostart of the DE and start it via shell when you really need it.

People are overcomplicating stuff because they fear for security.

Move fast and break stuff, and just start somewhere.

You will not die if you run your setup without reverse proxy for a week.

Just go step for step till everything is nice and secure.

Also the thing about understanding everything is a habit that you get in school. But in bigger software projects it’s not feasible at least in my experience.

I’m currently using CasaOS but I keep hearing bad things about it such as very poor security.

Never heard that before, if that is your reason i would just continue using it.