I prefer the terms hetero and cishets
How about we don’t use any sexuality as an insult
Neither are good
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Yeah you’re right. One has been much more widely used. Then it fell out of favour in a big way when people realised how stupid, cringey, and damaging it is.
It went from being said nonchalantly by everyone to now almost exclusively being used in an ironic fashion by people who aren’t straight. I know I do.
Let’s not try to have some kind of weird, pathetic culture war with straight people as some kind of quest for retribution.
Even if one is “less bad” according to some made up metric you decided on, why would you want to stoop to the lesser of two evils? Why don’t we all just not use someone’s sexuality against them?
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What’s offensive is using someone’s sexuality as an insult as stated in the OP. It doesn’t matter how you try to justify it. It’s a dick move. I don’t care if you’re gay. I’m also gay. It doesn’t give anyone the right to be an asshole.
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I’m literally just saying don’t insult anyone based on their sexuality. That’s it. Nothing more nothing less. The rest you are making up in your mind. It’s wild to me how a conversation can go from “don’t use someones sexuality as an insult” to “you don’t care that gay people are getting executed” without me saying literally anything about straight people or gay people.
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Both can be funny in the right context. Furthermore, using “straight” as an insult doesn’t uphold any kind of systemic oppression, so I have a hard time reading it as anything other than a joke.
The most problematic thing about it is that it is reminiscent of homophobia, but y’all gotta learn to make the difference. Giving bigoted straight people a taste of their own medicine in a context where it cannot possibly hurt them (unlike actual homophobia) is funny.
Insults are a conversational, social, and emotional weapon. Weapons have valid uses, for example in self defence.
The use of many weapons has effects beyond the immediate violence they do. For example if you buy a gun from a cartel, you help them scale their business and sell more guns, leading to more gun violence. Likewise if you use slurs against marginalised communities, you reinforce the stigma and make the slur more potent, increasing the violence done later. You’re emboldening an infrastructure of violence in both cases.
If you insult someone by calling them gay, you hurt them and you also hurt all gay people. But if you insult someone by calling them straight, you hurt them without hurting all straight people. Because you are not emboldening an extant infrastructure of violence.
Listen to your mental gymnastics. Just don’t insult anyone with their sexuality. Period. You could take it even farther and just say “don’t insult anyone” Seems pretty safe to me.
You could take it even farther and just say “don’t insult anyone” Seems pretty safe to me.
That suggestion seems to be beyond your capabilities, since you began your comment with a sarcastic quip intended to insult my reasoning capabilities.
The longest “no u” I’ve heard in a while, congrats.
If you don’t want to be called a hypocrite, maybe you could stop being a hypocrite.
Buddy, I didn’t insult u. I just said listen to what ur saying and maybe make better choices. Now u literally are insulting me. I cannot with u. Goodbye lol.
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When you fall to their level, you’ve already lost.
Remember how people called homosexual people, “gay”, as an insult and instead of making it a bad word, like the n word, homosexual men were like, “You know what? Fuck you. I am gay. And I’m not just going to let you call me gay. I’m going to call myself gay.”? And this word that could have grown to be as powerful of an insult as the n word became empowering to the people it was intended to shun. I always thought that was a baller move.
I have always thought that people that want to insult me are going to do it, no matter what, and people that want to be respectful to me, are going to do it no matter what.
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But that’s what they said. That the word “gay” could have been as powerful as insult. Not that it is.
I’m bi, but most people don’t know. I’ve been called a “breeder” once as an insult, and it was a term being thrown around a lot years ago, I haven’t heard it in years which is good cause I don’t think those people realized the connotations of that word, especially used towards a person of color
I reserve that insult exclusively for people who engage in pregnancy and birth kink. Which I consider to be pedophilia.
So you mean the natural desire for people to get pregnant and have children? Huh, TIL that the vast majority of all people who ever existed are pedophiles for wanting children.
Sexualising a baby is pedophilia.
I prefer cishet, but I pronounce it sis-shaay.
Sishay away.
I hate you not for using the term but strictly because of that pronunciation.
who the heck is insulted by that. granted I think gay guys have only ever said it to me in a jest type of way.
Right? The comments in this thread are fkn weird
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I’ve recently graduated to enby and ambiguously queer.
They happened.
I have never heard that as an insult in my entire life. Looks like it is not even popular to begin with.
Maybe using any sexuality as a pejorative is bad?
I call myself cishet sometimes, meant as an insult.
My trick is I don’t let what people call me bother me. I was raised with the old saying “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me”.
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Or you realise that the people insulting you are brain dead and not worth the energy is takes to process their sound waves.
When ive seen what makes them cheer, why would their opinion have any effect on me?
This. Exactly what I am getting at. It’s not worth your energy to get upset over people who trying to bring YOU as an individual down by simply calling you names.
I didn’t say words. I said names. This person was called gay… as an insult. For whatever reason by some people. He shouldn’t let it bother him because those people aren’t worth the time of day to have such a narrow point of view that identifies a person as who they are by a single aspect of who they are rather than seeing the entirety of who they are.
That’s where I believe you are wrong. Sure, things hurt my feelings. I grew up being picked on. But eventually, you realize it’s the other people’s problem and not yours. They think X… so what? That’s what they believe. Unless they intentionally damage your life by influencing coworkers, friends, and family, simple “name calling” is useless words that only hurt your feelings because you care what that person thinks. And if that person is putting you down to try and make you feel bad, their words should not matter to you at all…
Unless they intentionally damage your life by influencing coworkers, friends, and family,
I hate to break it to you, but what you just described is precisely what stigmatising gayness does.
Sociopaths have feelings, the idea that they don’t is a false stereotype. Actually, the word “sociopath” itself is inaccurate and often considered a slur.
That’s unbelievably privileged and offensive
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It’s not “just words” when everyone in your life is screaming insults at you and making laws to restrict your rights
Psychology would love a word.