• intensely_human@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    5
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    9 months ago

    if they don’t plan to or hadn’t even considered proposal, they can start thinking about that

    And if they were expecting to organically come to this conclusion through shared experience, that’s off the table.

    • toynbee@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      6
      ·
      9 months ago

      I wouldn’t say it’s lost. If the relationship has good communication, the poster can simply explain to their girlfriend what happened. Hopefully, this can then just be a funny story to tell, perhaps at their eventual potential wedding.

      The experience can be taken by those in the relationship to not mean anything other than that the girlfriend is not opposed to marriage. The poster can choose to not discuss their feelings on marriage, other than that this was unintentional and they’re not ready yet. Then the relationship can develop as it would normally.

      However, it’s true that a lot of what I’m suggesting depends on the details of OP’s relationship. Not knowing them, their situation, their relationship or their views on marriage, it is not impossible that this could cause problems.

      • exocrinous@startrek.website
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        9 months ago

        Just say “That’s lot from me, that’s from Jose, the immigrant trapped in a sobe factory who is being enslaved by Pepsi Co under threat of deportation, and needs a marriage visa so he can pursue his dream of becoming a tailor. If you want to marry Jose, go ahead.”

    • Mesophar@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      9 months ago

      It very much sounds like the girlfriend had arrived at that point organically before they did, though. If she was able to say yes to the bottlecap so easily, and they hadn’t even put thought into it yet. So it sounds like coming to that point through shared experience was already off the table.