I’m too embarrassed of myself to actually check but I am pretty darn sure that I’ve been sent, cumulatively over the however many months I’ve been panhandling here, over a thousand dollars, and it’s all just gone to stupid shit. I could’ve saved at least some of that and bought a fucking van already, and gotten my driver’s license even (things which I was thinking about fundraising for).

Also look at Creamsicle! He’s a burrito!

  • FunkyStuff [he/him]@hexbear.netEnglish
    25·
    6 months ago

    Every cent you’ve received here has come from people who, fully voluntarily, just want to see you make it and not suffer as much as this hellish society wants you to. There’s no reason to be ashamed of receiving solidarity. I hope the future brings better days and you can get around to getting those things you need. Stay safe comrade (and comrade Creamsicle) 07

  • QuietCupcake [any, they/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
    15·
    6 months ago

    I do click on your posts in here when I see them and I’m not sick of you, but I’m also not someone who has contributed (only reason I have enough food for myself now is because I’m on food stamps too). But since you’re concerned and feeling like the money help you got here went to “stupid shit,” could you maybe plan out a kind of rough budget to try to stick to? I know it’s not easy when you’re unhoused (makes literally everything at least tenfold more difficult) and if you’re always on the verge of being dopesick then planning ahead can seem completely pointless. But just forming an outline of any kind of structure to follow can help, in my experience. Like laying out what your next week might look like if possible, and committing to setting aside some of whatever cash you can get, especially if you do that fundraiser, putting a set percentage of it towards the van, but also spending some that will let you enjoy the moment right there and then. And writing it all out keeping track in a notebook or note app in your phone. Someone here might even be able to help you work out the logistics if that’s something you wanted. I really hope none of this comes across as condescending, I don’t mean it that way at all. I’m just thinking about what kinds of things would have been helpful to me in the past.

    Oh and Creamsicle should know he’s supposed to wear the foil on his head to keep them from accessing his superior intellect or inserting their programming. Or perhaps he’s protecting his gonads? I don’t know, I also don’t want to presume whether he’s got those.

      • QuietCupcake [any, they/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
        5·
        6 months ago

        Clearly I don’t know him, but I’ve known others like him and was under the impression he may have elaborate designs on the downfall of capitalism, the kind of information none of us here would want to fall into the wrong hands. Apologies if I misunderstood the circumstances.

    • allthetimesivedied [they/them, she/her]@hexbear.netOPEnglish
      5·
      6 months ago

      Yeah, I say my life is chaotic but that is by and large my own doing. For years now I’ve lived each day as if it were disjointed from the next. And that’s a lot of why I’m here in the hole I’m in.

      Years ago when I was homeless and kinda gave a fuck about myself, I could actually do things like pay a phone bill every month.

      And I’m hoping that once I beat malnutrition, if that ever happens, I’ll be able to have the mental wherewithal to start creating content, which will broaden my fundraising abilities.

      • QuietCupcake [any, they/them]@hexbear.netEnglish
        7·
        6 months ago

        Well the chaos may be rooted in choices you made, but the circumstances you ended up in are horrible for reasons far outside of anything you could possibly be blamed for. The fact that you struggle to afford food and find shelter is the fault of a sick, pathologically individualist, poor-shaming, capitalist society. So don’t blame yourself. I know what it is to be in a hole with seemingly no way out. But making the choice now to work on a plan that you lay out for yourself to follow could maybe start help taming some of that chaos, perhaps?

        But yeah, one step at a time of course, and if malnutrition is the main factor keeping you from doing what you want or need to do, maybe for now, work specifically on a plan to deal with just that. You have SNAP or something, right? Maybe budget that shit out and plan how much you have and what nutritious foods it can get you. Sorry if you’ve talked about it in your posts and I missed it, but do you have access to foodbanks? That could solve your malnutrition problem in one fell swoop if it’s a good foodbank. There may even be people there that can help you plan out your meals for the week. If that’s not a thing where you are, I know you were considering shoplifting groceries but were nervous about it, and while I would never encourage you to do something that could put you in legal/cop-related danger, there are certain methods for shoplifting food that are easy and relatively low risk. And as we know, comrades here can help out with food too. All of these things can be… mapped out, then implemented, but it does take some dedication. So yeah, if it were me, I think I’d try to tackle that issue fairly single-mindedly until you’re satisfied you’re eating healthy consistently. Then you can work on the next thing that will get you, like you said, to the headspace necessary to start doing the content creation thing. If it’s the kind of content you could safely share here, I know I for one would love to see it when you’re able to start creating. It’s an awesome goal to have.

        Again, I hope that isn’t just sounding like unsolicited advice from some asshole who doesn’t know your circumstances. I just empathize with being in shit situations with an addiction, a totally uncertain immediate future and even more uncertain long term future, and the feeling like I’m just unmoored and flapping in the wind, just getting knocked around by the chaos without any control. But making a set plan can help give back at least a little piece of it, a small but meaningful sense of control.